I would be very upset if someone gave me an ultimatum of complete NC with anyone I'd slept with or them. They'd be asking me to sacrifice my friends for them. I'd have to check at every event if they were going to be there and what if they changed their mind and turned up anyway? Would I have to leave? It would also put my friends in a horrible situation and make everything much more awkward than it needs to be.
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Thankfully she's settled down now, but there was no way the group was going to exclude any exes just to keep the new girlfriend appeased. Nor was the guy going to dump his large friendship group of over thirty years so that the new girlfriend would be happy about him not seeing exes.
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Maybe it's as easy as being able to look inwardly and tell one's self "this person isn't the one for me, she doesn't match my values", there is nothing wrong with that, and doesn't make her a bad person either.
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